13 Comments
User's avatar
caryl murphy's avatar

I stay in freeze response. I've had lots of trauma in my life and have CPTSD. I find doing the simplest things, paying bills, making calls, self care, all are like climbing a mountain some days. I stay numbed out alot. I learned this as a child. I wasn't allowed to express any emotion except happy as a child. I disassociate a lot! I started this to as a 9 year old to cope with trauma of being molested and having zero support from my parents. Hence being victimized twice,by betrayal trauma. Im 48 years old and i started on my healing journey two years ago. Doing intensive work with a trauma coach in addition to traditional counseling. Getting myself out of freeze response and stopping disassociating has been the most challenging processes over encountered, aside from trying to tackle negative self talk, that I've faced on my healing journey.

Expand full comment
Patricia W.'s avatar

Caryl, thank you so much for sharing your story. I can’t imagine how hard that journey has been, but it’s incredibly powerful that you’ve taken those steps toward healing. I know how hard it is to stop dissociating, and getting out of freeze is such tough work. The fact that you’ve committed to this process is so courageous. Be gentle with yourself, and keep going—you’re making incredible progress ❤

Expand full comment
Dawn-Renée Rice's avatar

Sending you lots of love! I'm also 48, diagnosed with CPTSD with Dissociation, and have to deal with this regularly. It sounds like you're doing all that you can do to manage it. 🫂

Expand full comment
Deborah Healey 🇬🇧's avatar

I would be interested to read more about the Freeze Response and the tools suggested, in how to over come this.

Thank you.

Expand full comment
Ed's avatar

I’ve never considered that I was in this state before reading. Thank you so much!

Expand full comment
Patricia W.'s avatar

That’s exactly why I write, Ed! I’m glad it helped you see things in a new way.

Expand full comment
John's avatar

Thank you, thank you, thank you 🙏

Expand full comment
Patricia W.'s avatar

Thank you so much, John! 🙏 Glad it resonated with you!

Expand full comment
Erin's avatar

Thank you for writing this piece Patricia! It rings so true for me. I have hit a very rough past 4 years, mainly because I just couldn’t maintain the pushing through mindset I had for all the years before. Now I feel overwhelmed very easily and end up experiencing all the things you referred to. I have been in a fight or flight response my entire life, and have been now been pushed into freeze response due to the pressures life has put on my nervous system. I always need reminding that when I can’t cope, it’s not a failure on my part. Learning to be gentle with myself when this happens has been one of my greatest challenges. Again, thank you for reminding me I’m not alone in these types of struggles❤️

Expand full comment
Lila Sterling's avatar

Perfect! I wrote it out on paper as an integrative practice. I’ve been in this state for the last 2 days. This time with way more internal resources than ever. I was / am able to be so much more present to what hurts, what cries, what needs seeing and am finding the grace and strength and courage to LOOK with more tender curiosity than ever. Thank you and thank all of you who commented. Every word is precious to me. ❤️

Expand full comment
Sandra's avatar

I wonder if this “freeze” has a medical term? Or is it just a coping mechanism?

Expand full comment
sukhi's avatar

super informative - thanks for sharing

Expand full comment